CtrlAltDelete: The Beginning (Arschloch's Story)

Something I wrote para sa CtrlAltDelete....
and for the record... Arschloch != me

It all started 5 years ago, Arschloch was lying in his bed staring straight up, he had been awake for more than an hour now, but he has not stirred. Arschloch has been busy reviewing the events that shook up his existence over the past few months. He had been accused by a teacher of cheating with consent, the teacher claimed that he allowed a classmate to copy his project. Arschloch defended himself by telling the truth, that his project had been copied without his knowledge, but this time the truth did not help. After a flurry of disciplinary board meetings and factfinding sessions the board ruled against him and had him suspended indefinitely. This ruling in turn meant that the failing grade he received stayed on his permanent record and his scholarship with the DOST was cut-off.

A low rumbling growl emanating from his stomach interrupted Arschloch's reverie, he glanced at the clock on the dresser, it was almost 2 o'clock in the afternoon now. He slowly sat up and scanned the room he shared with four others this has been his home since enrolling at the University as a fresh faced kid some four years ago. His eyes fell on the silent radio on the dresser near the mirror to his left. His gay roommate had once again changed his hiding place for the power cord of the radio, and this time Arschloch and his other two roommates were unable to find the cord. 'Damn', mutters Arschloch , it has gotten even lonelier now without the music supplied by the radio. Another rumbling sound from his stomach interrupts Arschloch, and on top of that, his bladders feels like it is about to burst. Left with no choice Arschloch gets up and heads to the bathroom.

After a quick trip to the toilet and a quick shower, Arschloch is now back in his room looking for his favorite shirt and fisherman's cap, he finds both under a pile of fresh laundry. He quickly puts on the grey shirt, and starts to head out, but he does a quick u-turn after realizing that he had left his hat, he stops by the mirror for awhile to look at himself, his curly hair was going all over the place, but that was quickly solved by putting on his hat.

A gust of the dusty and polluted air of Cebu hits Arschloch squarely as he opens the door, he breathes all of this in, 4 years in Cebu has gotten him used to the air. His thoughts drift towards his friends. Most of his buddies at the University had graduated that March. It was a bittersweet time for Arschloch, he was happy for them, he also knew that when his buddies found work, getting together would be much more difficult. As he heads on down the stairs, he thinks of his buddies, and how easy it would be to text them and organize a get together for that evening.... that is if he had a phone. He was contemplating all of these when he hears 'Nang Eva, his Landlady holler 'Good morning'. He quickly retorts, 'Afternoon na man Nang Eva' followed by a hearty laughter shared by both of them, this was a running inside joke between the two of them, Nang Eva always greets Arschloch with a good morning, regardless of whether it was 10 in the evening or 10 in the morning, this was because Arschloch, during his suspension had develop a habit staying up all night and sleeping all day.

Downstairs to Arschloch's room was a carenderia also owned by Nang Eva, this is where Arschloch usually eats. "Mokaon ka Shloch?" asks Nang Eva. "Naa pay sud-an Nang?" replies Arschloch. Nang Eva points to the pans and kettles on display, indicating that what was inside those displays were the available viands left. Arschloch heads towards the display table and scouts the available food, he settles on the bistek tagalog for today and orders two servings of rice for starters.

Arschloch looked at the plates around him, he had ordered 3 additional servings of rice, and he still felt that there was room for more in his stomach. He decides that he has had enough, the bistek tagalog was now all gone, he didn't want to spend an additional 15 pesos for another serving of viand. His thoughts returned to contacting his buddies, nothing has changed from 30 minutes ago, he still had no phone and no way to contact his buddies. Then his thoughts turned towards the internet, but this was 5 years ago, networking websites were not as they are today, the friendster phenomenon hadn't taken hold yet. And not everyone had an internet connection, unlike today. He began weighing his options, either he go back upstairs and lie in his bed until he develops bedsores or he could go to the internet cafe and try his luck with finding his friends online. It was a no contest, as he begins walking towards the nearest internet cafe.

This particular internet cafe was divided into two rooms, the gaming room and the surfing room. The gaming room was loud as it always was, even though the door was closed, you could even hear a 'Fire in the Hole' sound clip every so often. Arschloch had previously spent countless hours at this very same room playing CounterStrike, Diablo, Need for Speed and many other games, but that was not his purpose here today as he turns right towards the surfing room instead.

The blast of cold air from the air conditioner hits Arschloch square in the face as he enters the surfing room. The ambiance in this room was very different from the gaming room, every computer had a headphone instead of the over-sized speakers that was par for the course at the gaming room. Arschloch chooses his spot and starts to daydream of who was going to be online today.

Two hours have passed since Arschloch started surfing, there were no familiar nicks in any of the usual channels in MIRC, nobody was online on his instant messenger. He had spent the past two hours chatting up strangers and trying to pick up women in MIRC, he had been mildly successful, but the reason he was here was not this, he wanted to contact his friends. He was now low on patience and running out of time. So he decides to check his email one more time and head somewhere else. He saw that he had received another message which had countless of cc's in it, which led to him thinking that it would be much more convenient if you only had to email a single address and everyone would receive your message. 'Now, that would be a great business idea' Arschloch mutters. As luck would have it, someone had already thought of that idea and had already put it into operation in the form of the Yahoo! Groups.

Arschloch was now busy signing up for the Yahoo! Groups. But he still had a problem, he didn't know what to name the group, he searched high and low for a name that would be appropriate, but he couldn't think of any, that was until one of the computers near him was forced to reboot bejavascript:void(0)
Publish Postcause of a bug, that's when Arschloch thought of the name reboot, which was a computer term, it was relevant to his situation now... he needed a fresh start, a reboot if you will. But he still had reservations on the name, it was too obvious and it sounded like a failed TV show. Then it hit him, the name was right there on the keyboard, it had been staring at him the whole time... the three keys that when pressed together allowed you to close non responding programs and/or reboot your system... he has finally found the perfect name for the group and he hastily enters it into the space provided: CtrlAltDelete and with those 13 keystrokes, an era begins.